Warner Home Video | Review by Dan Taylor
There's
an old showbiz adage about never working
with children or animals. Mariel Hemingway
and Michael Pare must have an inordinate
amount of confidence in their acting abilities
to undertake not one, but both of those
tasks in Eric Red's BAD MOON.
Exploitation afficianados
out there might remember Red as screenwriter
of such grade-A fare as THE HITCHER and
NEAR DARK. Unfortunately, others out there
might remember him for the uninspired screenwriting/directing
effort COHEN & TATE (ER24), a dull,
one-star effort about bickering hitmen that
starred Adam Baldwin and Roy Scheider. Things
are looking up once the credits roll and
I discover that BAD MOON is actually based
on the novel Thor, though it has
nothing to do with the Marvel Comics character
or the well-oiled heavy metal artist.
Thor turns out to be the dog
owned by tough-as-nails lawyer Hemingway,
who lives in a woodsy locale with her young,
blonde, oh-so-cute son (Mason Gamble of
DENNIS THE MENACE fame). When Hemingway's
brother -- the old, dark, oh-so-cute Pare
(STREETS OF FIRE, EDDIE & THE CRUISERS)
-- arrives after a prolonged absence, it
seems like happy days are here again.
Until Mom and son discover
that Uncle Ted's developed an unhealthy
interest in the subject of lycanthropy,
has been keeping an incriminating journal,
and has a ridiculous number of test tubes
in his motor home. What they don't realize
is that ol' Ted had a pre-credits run-in
with a werewolf (Werewolf? There wolf!)
after it savagely attacked, mauled, and
ripped his girlfriend to shreds during a
campsite episode of bumping uglies. She
dies, he gets bit, he kills werewolf. Do
we all see where this is heading?
The best flicks in the genre
(AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON, THE HOWLING)
at least play with the pre-conceived notions
of werewolf lore and spin them around. BAD
MOON simply trots them out in order, though
Red does keep the flick lean and mean at
a trim 80 minutes...so it won't be long
till it shows up on the Sci-Fi Channel for
free.
The
chicks'll dig it 'cause Pare often has his
shirt off, and fans of the perverse will
enjoy seeing the STREETS OF FIRE hero pissing
on Thor's doghouse to mark his territory.
In the hands of a more capable actor, Ted's
crossing the line into wolfdom might've
been more convincing, but we're talking
about a guy that comes in a distant fourth
to the German Shepard, Hemingway, and a
Macauly Culkin clone when the acting honors
are handed out.
Oh, and could someone please
explain the cultural setting that produces
WASP-y princess Hemingway and Pare's Noow-Yawk
younger brother? It's a bit of a stretch...
