Pop Cinema | Review by James Greene | Available from Amazon
Jimmyo Burril’s comedic gorefest CHAINSAW SALLY sets up its namesake as a sultry psychopath lurking beneath the veneer of a small town librarian. Initially, Sally (April Monique Burril) focuses her bloodlust only on those who have violated the strict rules of her nine-to-five domain (she chases one girl into the woods and guts her spectacularly for harboring an overdue book). This would have been enough for me. As someone whose biggest pet peeve is rude library patrons, I was all geared up for ninety minutes of screechy children and ignorant cell phonies meeting with cruel, unusual deaths. Alas, an actual plot soon reared its ugly head, providing Sally with a motive beyond the follies of an inconsiderate general public. I hate it when that happens.
A heated dispute between greedy developers and a wealthy land owner takes center stage in CHAINSAW SALLY. The town wants a prime chunk of land pried away from the soft hands of rogue millionaire Steve Kellerman (Mark Redfield). Steve isn’t so sure he wants to sell; he’s especially intrigued by rumors of a grizzly murder that took place years ago on said land (perhaps he’s considering opening a haunted bed and breakfast). Naturally, the murder in question involved good ol’ Chainsaw Sally. In fact, it’s the horrific event that caused her to go nutsoid in the first place. Lucky for her, no one else in town seems to have any idea what played out that terrible night, despite the fact the legendary crime took place only fifteen years ago. Lack of suitable law enforcement seems to be a recurring problem for this fictional villa – the only cops present both look like they just dropped out of the eighth grade.
Feeling protective of the home she witnessed her first bloodbath in, Sally begins meddling in this acreage affair with the expected disgusting results. Along the way, she keeps her game up by psychologically torturing bimbos, castrating a drunk, killing an ice cream girl by force-feeding her poison, and engaging in perverted late night hi-jinks with her gay male roommate. All this carnage sounds great on paper, but it doesn’t play out very well in the film. Questionable editing and poor sound work deflate some of the biggest scenes, including horror legend Gunnar Hansen’s brief appearance as Sally’s loving father. The script is a bit shaky, too, relying mostly on stupid one-liners and clichéd dialogue for the big laughs (be forewarned: this film contains a painfully unfunny “Is Batman gay?” discussion between two characters).
There’s a pretty smart nod to JAWS at the beginning of CHAINSAW SALLY that I’d say is worth the price of admission. Aside from that, there’s no reason not to skip this one and go somewhere else for your HLTGC (that’s Homicidal Librarian Tits n’ Gore Comedy) needs. Although I’m not currently aware of any other films that fall into that category, I am sure they exist and are just waiting to be discovered by rabid fans of the genre. If your local video shack fails you, don’t forget to check the library – just watch out for free-roaming toddlers and unwashed drifters.
