Pop Cinema | Buy at Amazon | Review by Sinferno
This movie contains Misty Mundae the most famous modern B movie queen. Surely by now most of you know what this movie is about so a formal review almost seems superfluous. For those of you who have never seen a Misty Mundae movie before let me tell you how they all go. First of all they not only feature the loose porn title but basic premise of a real movie. Nothing special there, but the action usually centers around Mundae acting as the main character who eventually gets captured, tied up, stripped naked and groped by some sort of supernatural entity or entities. She eventually works herself free and saves the day after enduring countless dry humping (usually lesbian) encounters. Roll credits. Still, I owe you the reader more so I will struggle to talk about each one of them in the deep and informative fashion that they deserve. Hahaha – sorry.
In AN EROTIC WEREWOLF IN LONDON Misty Mundae gets bitten by a female werewolf after making love to her in an abandoned bar. This causes her to become a were-wolf (Whore-wolf?) as well, which compels her to seduce other women wholesale and sprout fake fur and puppy make-up whenever she is aroused to the point of orgasm (Talk about a monster in the sack). Fortunately this movie is well stocked with female victims for her to "feast upon". Eventually her lesbian girlfriend, fearing for the good of society practices some prudent S+M quarantine action, tying her to the bed with the usual sex bondage restraints of compassionate reason and then arouses her until she transforms... all so she can shoot her to death. A hard finale to a touching love story between man and beast that struck me as eerily similar to the Disney classic OLD YELLER except in case of the latter, the dog kept its tongue in its mouth now and then.
The second feature – NIGHT OF THE GROPING DEAD – is a zombie flick where a girl (Ruby Larocca) is kidnapped in a laundromat and taken to a place where three male goth zombies fawn over and chew on her. This causes her to become a hot goth undead princess, who lusts only for "The crack of dawn", so she can use it to unleash her zombie army (three guys who kidnapped and chewed on her for the past hour) against the world.
Well, surprise, surprise, the Crack of Dawn is none other than a pendant worn by Misty Mundae herself who gets kidnapped, stripped and sexually tormented by the zombie queen for sport. After the seduction and utter brainwashing of Miss Mundae she and the queen just decide to throw the all powerful pendant in the trash, giving up any plans of world domination so they can fuck again, instead. To say the plot of this movie is perversely retarded is actually an insult to disabled people with sexual addictions everywhere who despite their issues, still deserve brainier, nastier porn than these unrated antics. Moreover, the effects in this one were so bad, you could actually see the Tupperware container of fake blood in some shots, only to have it disappear in others. I figured a movie chock full of gory cannibalism and forced lesbian sex could have at least opened itself up for some interesting scenes of conspicuous consumption and sick/slick food metaphors, but the flesh feasts were ultimately too rancid to make this viewer hunger for anything but the fade to credits.
| Yucko/Neato Factor: Unrated sex and unconvincing monsters made me neither lust nor dread. |
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| Production Values: I've seen better sex scenes on Cinemax and more intimidating monsters on Sesame Street. |
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| Realism: Only gibberish typed here in ALL CAPS can accurately depict how stupid this set was-BEEDLE BO BOOBIE BEE! |
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| Value for Price: Average. If you must have every Misty Mundae movie, this isn't the purchase that will make you rethink your life's priorities. |
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| Plot: All that licking left it lacking. |
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