MCA/Universal
Video | Review by Dan Taylor
I've been wondering for some
time exactly how bad MALLRATS could be.
Let's face it, the flick has its fair share
of detractors, not least of whom is director/writer
Kevin Smith (!) who publicly apologized
for it at this year's Sundance Festival.
Apologized! For making a movie! Shit, if
this guy's apologizing for MALLRATS I can
think of twenty directors that should personally
refund my money!!
But back to the issue at hand.
Is MALLRATS bad, and if so, just how bad?
I had the chance to ponder those questions
after renting the flick this past Friday.
It was getting late, I had a bottle of wine
in the car, some kielbasa in my belly, and
the Full Moon release VAMPIRE
JOURNALS in my hands. Could this flick
really ruin a perfectly fine evening?
I won't keep you in suspense,
'cause the answer is...no. MALLRATS isn't
as bad as has been suggested (one friend
went so far as to label it "unwatchable"),
despite a threadbare story, a lead that
drops the ball acting-wise, and a premise
that limps through its third act. Those
problems aside, this is pretty funny stuff.
I mean, we're not talking THE PRODUCERS
funny, but we're also not talking WEEKEND
AT BERNIE'S or NATIONAL LAMPOON'S SCUBA
SCHOOL!
Like I said, the premise is
pretty thin: TS (Jeremy London) and Brodie
(Jason Lee) are buds that happen to get
dumped on the same day. Judging from their
respective girlfriends (Clair Forlani and
Shannen Doherty), I'm not all that sure
this is a bad thing. With nothing better
to do on such a day, they retreat to the
mall -- not unlike the zombies in DAWN OF
THE DEAD -- and go through the mini-rituals
that dignify and define their shallow lives.
As Brodie says upon entering, "I love
the smell of commerce in the morning."
And that's about as deep as it gets.
Along the way it's a comic
free-for-all as the two anti-heroes encounter
anally-obsessed clothing salesmen, their
exes, a vindictive rent-a-cop, Marvel honcho
Stan Lee (also seen in Larry Cohen's THE
AMBULANCE), and a game show producer (played
by HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER star
Michael Rooker who sports a shaved head).
More importantly, in the film's
lone nod to CLERKS, they encounter and acquire
the services of Silent Bob and Jay, whose
weird, cinematic world provides some of
the flick's highlights. I mean, come on,
you didn't laugh when Jay clobbers the security
guard and screams Terence Stamp's legendary
SUPERMAN II line, "Kneel before Zod!"?
(Fans of Silent Bob and Jay can rest assured
in the knowledge that they will return in
DOGMA -- Smith's fourth feature -- scheduled
for release in 1999.)
Unfortunately, MALLRATS has
its share of weak spots, none bigger than
London in the role of the sympathetic lead.
He comes off as drippy and delivers his
lines like he's reading from a cue card
just off-stage, much like his puppy-dog
performance in tv's most-overrated program,
'Party of Five.' Of course, it doesn't help
that he shares 90% of his scenes with Lee,
a former pro skateboarder shining in his
first major role. Without a doubt he's the
flick's lightning rod, and gives the impression
that he IS Brodie Bruce. It's a fantastic
performance in a film that doesn't deserve
the bad rap it's been handed.
For more Kevin Smith flickage,
see our reviews of CHASING
AMY and JAY
AND SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK.
