New
Line Home Video | Review by Dan Taylor
Before I start bashing this
thing, let me say that I do give
it points for having a black superhero (even
if he is the spawn of Satan) and for portraying
an interracial marriage as an everyday occurence.
On the other hand, lets take some points
away for its hard-to-follow, incredibly
disjointed story and the fact that all the
action seems to jump between a third-rate
Hell set and DB Sweeney's living room! Oh,
I guess the bashing has begun...
I'm
never quite sure about the actual Spawn
chronology. Was it a toy and then a comic
book, or is it the other way around? Either
way, in recent years it went from being
a highly-regarded, violence-caked HBO animated
series (also available on video) to an inevitable
place in the cinematic superhero sweepstakes.
And with BATMAN & ROBIN falling miserably
short (in all arenas) and few other heroes
on the horizon, SPAWN could've made a killing
if it'd been halfway decent. Unfortunately,
it ain't.
Suffering the fate of most
"origin" tales, SPAWN takes too
long to set up what could be pretty quickly
explained: Satan needs a general to lead
his legions on Earth, and he makes a pact
to turn a government killing machine into
a super-powered "Hell spawn."
Bingo! End of set-up! Lets get to the ass-kicking!
But no, director Mark A. Z. Dippé
and screenwriter Alan B. McElroy (from a
story by McElroy and Zippé) drag
Michael Jai-White's transformation into
and acceptance of his Spawn persona out
to what seems like half the film's surprisingly
slow 94 minute running time. (Running 8
minutes longer than the theatrical release.)
After
that it's a mind-boggling (and not in a
good way) mish-mash of action film cliches
as Spawn, his buddy (the miscast Sweeney)
and a centuries-old warrior (Nicol Williamson
of EXCALIBUR) fight the evil Clown (a made-up,
hammed-up John Leguizamo) and the sinister
Martin Sheen (slumming at Charlie Sheen
level for some quick pocket-change). There's
some stuff about poison gas mixed in, but
it's so poorly-developed that it's hard
to give a shit.
Despite some nifty CGI work
-- which don't explain the $12 Satan effects
-- SPAWN is a total dud.
