I'm a huge fan of the Bond series. I was a member of the 007 fan club, have first editions of most of the paperbacks, and often got chided for my devotion to both 007 and THE PLANET OF THE APES series.

Through the years I've been able to cast a more critical eye on the series than I was capable of as a callow youth. And, as the character of 007 lurches toward the new century, I find that I'm far less impressed by the gadget-heavy entries and more a fan of the flicks that bothered to have a plot surrounding the spectacular stunts and set pieces. In other words, give me DR. NO, FROM RUSSIAN WITH LOVE, GOLDFINGER, ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE, THE SPY WHO LOVED ME and LICENSE TO KILL any day. As for the smug dreck of the late-Connery era and almost all the Roger Moore entries, they could be launched into space or buried at sea for all I care.

And then along comes Brosnan. Pierce Brosnan. I'm sure we're all painfully familiar with the story of how Brosnan -- originally slated to replace the geriatric Moore -- was forced to continue portraying Remington Steele while Timothy Dalton stepped in to a role for which he was ill-suited . Which is a shame, since Dalton brought the character a world-weary attitude missing since the early days. Remember gang, Fleming's original character is a government assassin with a heart, a soul and a conscience, not a glib "super-spy" who'd rather spend his time tossing off bon mots and tossing back vodka martinis!

Tragically, it seems that the series is now beyond hope and repair. Despite critical raves heralding a return to the original story-heavy flicks, both GOLDENEYE and TOMORROW NEVER DIES have been dull, drawn-out affairs built around stunt pieces, not storylines.

Perhaps the formulaic nature has been even more exposed thanks to the brilliant AUSTIN POWERS, whose precise jabs at the series made watching TND more painful than it should've been. From the Connery-lite opening sequence to the outrageous product placements (BMW, Ericson, Smirnoff) and crucial "007 Underwater Sequence Mistake", this is far less a film than a bunch of stunts linked by a storyline that wouldn't take up one side of a cocktail napkin.